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Mom Strength

 Since becoming a mom, I have noticed a lot of new strength in myself. Not just physically either! I now believe that "mom strength" is wrapped into every part of this new being one has become when they become a mother. I noticed shifting and changing in myself throughout my pregnancy—I wrote about it in my other post What's My Favorite Color?—but I didn't know where it was taking me. I think I'm starting to figure it out more now.

    Mom Strength starts developing, physically, as soon as you start having contractions. It was the workout of my entire life! I have never pushed myself so hard, been so exhausted and sore, and felt so powerful before. It then continues as you do constant exercise by carrying your ever growing baby all day. Holding my little girl is a back and arm workout. Bouncing and walking with her is great cardio. Even today, my quads are so sore because I was wearing her on my chest and squatting down to change the bed sheets and clean around the house yesterday! Moms become capable of anything they need to do because they have to, honestly. I'm still waiting on the ability to open any jar or bottle, but I'm sure it will be here soon enough!

    Emotionally, I think there's some variance. Postpartum often comes with new anxieties, sadness, and even grief, so we feel weak emotionally, but we also find more ways to get through it and build resilience! I am always learning how to ask for and accept support and service from others. It has been remarkably better since I've started asking incredible people in my area to help me out (shout out to the marvelous BonnieJean, I appreciate you) and I've started making more friends. But even beyond that, I feel like I'm more confident than ever in myself and my appearance. Seems like something about pushing a person out of you while your whole body is on complete display for a group of people can help you overcome some insecurities! I love my body more than ever and I am more aware of how capable it is to do things that seem impossible. Along with the confidence, I'm happier, more loving, compassionate, eager to serve, and trusting in God. My brain has completely rewired to be the mother I need to be for my daughter. 

    Don't get me wrong, I'm still having some anxiety and I'm taking my antidepressants. I even restarted therapy as a preventative measure against any of the very hard things that can come with intense life changes—like depression, postpartum anger, and more. But I think there's an added strength that we have in our ability to cope as well as our ability to be supported. They are skills to develop and new mothers need those skills more than most!

    And of course, there's spiritual strength we have as moms. The prayer of a mother is incredibly powerful for her family. I think of Mary and how strong she must have been to be the Lord's mother on earth! What a powerful woman she must have been! To travel on foot and on an animal ~90 miles while heavily pregnant requires significant strength, endurance, and trust in God. And she was a mortal girl—we have that same capacity for strength within us. I feel closer to God now that I have a child—I know a little more about what He must feel for us. I want to be closer still to Him so I can be the best mama for my baby girl and so she can see His presence in our home throughout her life.

    It's been amazing to ponder on the ways that I've become stronger because I'm a mom. And I'm excited to see how I continue to grow and evolve in my strengths throughout my motherhood.  

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